Jim Cahill
I remember the day before I was asked to write this reflection, I said to my wife, Norma, “Honey, I love being Catholic!” Why? I’m an older fellow and I’ve lived and loved the unique and changing ways our Catholic faith is expressed, although there have been many changes.
As a grade schooler, Catholicism to me was the Latin Mass, high altars, veils, no meat, fasting starting at midnight, no laity on the altar or touching the host, Communion at the rail, somber black funeral Masses and lots of candles. Things in church had a heaviness, and lack of joy or celebration — a little like living the Mosaic law. There was a big focus on the high ritual and liturgy and low attention to a personal friendship with Christ. But I did it all so I wouldn’t go to hell.
Then during my two years in the seminary: Vatican II. Look out! English everywhere; genuflecting seemed optional; down with the statues and candles; let’s face the people at the altar; Communion in the hand; priests were actually leaving the priesthood; guitars and drums now; lots of new, upbeat liturgical music; homilies at all Masses; our beloved nuns began to become invisible; fewer seminarians. There was a much different high focus on the liturgy and music, but with low emphasis or guidance on personally loving Jesus. Again, I stayed with it because of my fear of hell, and after all that good Catholic education, you would never leave the Church, even though it was getting to be unfamiliar.
Then, as a 35-year-old adult whose life was not going well, came the huge gift of the Holy Spirit in my life. One night my dear friend Father Tim Nolan (recently deceased) prayed with me that the Holy Spirit would be activated in my heart again. At that moment, something happened. Something was given to me. I knew I was different. I began loving in a new way with new strength. The first difference was that I knew the crucifixion was something I contributed to by my sins. I saw the Father wished for me to be with him as he allowed the death of his Son for me, for us. I now met Jesus as my friend at Mass, at adoration. Confession was one friend telling the other that he messed up, and he actually was completely forgiven. The most dramatic change was the enriched personal sense of the presence of Jesus Christ living deep in my heart. What a difference over the years.
I love my Catholic faith because all the exterior elements that I mentioned at the beginning are now instruments of the Holy Spirit, and they sustain my friendship with Christ and my Father. It’s now been 50 years, and my Catholic life is alive with the love of God as the Holy Spirit keeps pouring more into my life and ministries.
Cahill, 82, and his wife, Norma, are members of Our Lady of Guadalupe in St. Paul. They also belong to People of Praise, an ecumenical Christian charismatic community. They moved to the west side of St. Paul so that they can build Christian community and help people develop a personal relationship with Jesus. They have four children and nine grandchildren, and enjoy making up bedtime stories for their grandchildren.
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