We’ve heard the saying “prayer changes things.” What if we were to add, “prayer changes us?”

When we offer prayers to God, to the saints, or to the Virgin Mary, we often assume these prayers will be answered in the fashion and timeliness to meet our expectations. However, when we are approaching the divine, the vantage point is much different than ours. The heavenly hosts have a view of the past, present and future, and when we accept that our view is limited, this can cause anxious feelings to flare up.

The question we must all ask ourselves is: Do we trust God?

We may say we trust God, but do we really? We may think we give him “carte blanche,” or the complete freedom to act as he wishes in our lives, but instead we hold back and say, “I will trust you can answer my prayer in any way you want, as long as it’s this or this”! How much faith does that demonstrate?

Faithful, concerted prayer requires a relationship, and in order to participate in this relationship, we must establish a solid connection with God, in which we approach him with humility and respect. His greatest desire is to have a full relationship with us, one in which we are truly present and fully invested in his plan for our lives.

The way we approach the prospect of God’s answer to our prayers in the way God wishes to answer them is often an indication of the depth of our faith. We may not feel terribly confident in God’s ability to move things on our behalf, and yet he tells us he wants us to ask him to meet our needs. Matthew 7:7 states, “Ask and you shall receive, knock and the door shall be opened to you.” Luke 18:1 encourages us to “pray always and do not lose heart.” First Thessalonians 5:17 inspires us to “pray without ceasing.” And Mark 11:22-25 explains, “Have faith in God. Amen, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be lifted up and thrown into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will happen, it shall be done for him. Therefore, I tell you, all that you ask for in prayer, believe that you will receive it and it shall be yours.”

ACTION CHALLENGEBegin today to develop a deeper relationship with God. Read and study Scripture, which is God’s word to us. Be open to the movement of the Holy Spirit in your life. Ask him to show you his presence, and then ask for the grace to help you be open to God’s divine touch in your life.

We may focus on what happens when our prayers are not answered in the way we have expected, and instead have been met with death, job loss, interrupted graduations and weddings, and funerals or memorial services that were not as they should have been. At these points, we may realize our faith is not as deep as we thought it was. We may wonder what God is doing and why he does not seem to be listening to our prayers for healing and restoration. How do we trust these passages from Scripture that have encouraged us to pray, only to find our prayers seemingly discarded and thrown away?

Prayer is established on the precept of a relationship. It is an offering we make to God after we have given him homage and praise, after we have made a confession of our sins and shown remorse, and after we have thanked him for his goodness and faithfulness. It is then that we make our request of him, thanking him for hearing us and our petition. We extend to him our best effort to be obedient, doing all we can to enter into right relationship with him and our fellow human beings.

There are many requirements to faithful prayer. It is not simply approaching the throne of God, tossing our request his way, and then scurrying back to our overly-busy, distracted, disobedient lives. We must stand humbly before the throne of God, bowing meekly at his feet, thanking him for his protection and mercy of ourselves and our loved ones, and then offering him our request.

Prayer requires a relationship. We must ask ourselves if we are willing to invest the time to establish such a connection with our God, which will then take us further into the depths of our faith. This is referred to as spiritual maturity, which is the expectation of every adult Christian.

Where are you on your spiritual walk with God?

Soucheray is a licensed marriage and family therapist and a member of Guardian Angels in Oakdale. She holds a master’s degree in theology from The St. Paul Seminary School of Divinity in St. Paul and a doctorate in educational leadership from St. Mary’s University of Minnesota.