Annulments, growth and grace: how a young priest defends the marriage bond

Father Matthew Northenscold, 32, recently earned his licentiate in canon law in order to work at the archdiocese’s tribunal and rule on annulments for divorced Catholics.

Q) When you were a seminarian, I bet you didn’t imagine yourself one day working at the tribunal.

A) I didn’t expect that I’d be a canon lawyer. But I knew the Lord is always with us, that his grace is going to be there, so this time of being called to step away from parish ministry to study and then to work on marriage cases has been a time where I need to exercise that trust more strongly. The Lord has indeed been with me.

Q) What was your reaction when Archbishop Hebda asked you to earn your licentiate in canon law?

A) It was a surprise. I got the email that archbishop wanted to meet with me. I’m like, “I don’t think I’ve done anything to be in trouble.” I wasn’t excited about it at first, because I love being a parish priest and I’ve never wanted to just work in an office away from the people, but I promised obedience to my bishop, and the Lord was in that. Then, as I started to study, I found it to be fascinating. My mind works well with systems of thought, so it seems like a good fit so far.

Q) Was your coursework through The Catholic University of America grueling?

A) It was intense. I had to study every part of the Code of Canon Law and be ready to answer questions about it. The Code of Canon Law is a big book — you don’t want to stub your toe on it. I realized that I have gone through the equivalent of the 23rd grade!

Q) Can you explain what a tribunal does?

A) A tribunal is similar to a civil court except the subject matter for canonical trials are limited to things the Church has jurisdiction over: rights and duties that flow from membership in the Church and especially things related to the sacraments. An annulment, or declaration of nullity, is a person claiming that their marriage was null and asking the Church’s tribunal to investigate and judge whether that’s true.

Q) What’s a common misconception about annulments?

A) The biggest misconception is that it’s just Catholic divorce. This is false. No power on earth can nullify a valid sacramental marriage. That’s why the term “annulment” is not actually accurate, since it makes it seem like the Church is annulling marriages. The better term is a declaration of nullity — after investigating, the Church has found the marriage was null from the beginning.

Q) What are reasons a marriage can be declared null?

A) Something was lacking from the couple’s consent. For instance, some couples feel pressure to get married by their family or because of a pregnancy. Some couples might be opposed to ever having children, which is one of the central elements of marriage. If the couple flat out refuses the possibility of having children, then that would be an invalid marriage.

Q) How can engaged couples learn from annulment cases?

A) Taking time to really reflect on if you’re mature enough to enter into marriage and to really discern — is this the person I want to spend my life with, that will make me a better person, that I want to be the parent of my children — rather than just drifting into marriage because you’ve been living together for a couple years so it’s the next step.

Q) What makes Lent a good time to take up an annulment?

A) Lent is about a deeper conversion. For someone who is divorced, part of the conversion the Lord is calling them to is listening to Jesus’ teaching about marriage and divorce. Lent is a great time to pray about this: “Lord, help me to understand this teaching, help me to believe it and show me what you are calling me to do to live in harmony with this teaching.”

Q) Annulments may be the least popular process in the Catholic Church.

A) I don’t think the process for a declaration of nullity is unpleasant, since it’s about finding the truth, and that’s a good and necessary thing. For me, it’s fulfilling to help that process of justice and peace move forward.

Q) In an ideal case, what good comes from an annulment?

A) What we see, in a lot of cases, is that the process of the applicant reflecting back on their life, analyzing their prior relationship in light of what they’ve learned since then, can often bring closure. They might be in a better place now to realize what mistakes they made or to see someone’s mistakes or sins. It can be an occasion for growth to happen and for the Lord to bring grace and peace — and it often is.

Q) How do you pair the intellectual preparation for your role with the spiritual and human elements of marriage, lived out in our messy, imperfect ways?

A) We know the law about marriage. The tricky part is seeing what the details of the particular human in the case was — in their situations and their difficulties — and determining how that impacts a marriage. It’s all in the details.

Q) That means being patient and observant.

A) I’m very detail oriented.

Q) Your title sounds almost medieval: defender of the bond. Someone seeking an annulment is arguing against a marriage, claiming it was never valid, but to be a balanced trial, the Church believes someone else should argue on behalf of the marriage, to claim it is valid. That’s what you do.

A) It’s a big responsibility. If there were no defender of the bond, then the process would be skewed in favor of nullity and it would become a rubber stamp rather than a truth-seeking process.

Q) Is it discouraging to wade through case after case?

A) You can read a lot of heavy topics. Sometimes you just need to take a step back, take a deep breath, go for a walk and come back to it later. People deal with a lot of real heavy stuff in their lives, a lot of the cross.

Q) What makes a walk therapeutic?

A) I like to hike through the woods with my rosary. It’s good to get the blood pumping. Walking is a long human tradition. Something about moving through the world can help you to think.

Q) You also get support from fellow priests as a member of the Companions of Christ, and you live with three other priests.

A) The fraternity makes me a better priest. We often have dinner together. We might watch a movie together or play a game. It’s a blessing to have brothers since I know they’ll be with me, and I know that if I start to lose my way, they’ll be there to call me back.

Q) What’s your go-to prayer?

A) I’m a big fan of the St. Ignatius Prayer for Generosity. It’s something to pray for because selflessness doesn’t come naturally to us. I’m more fulfilled on the days I’ve been generous than on the days I was more selfish or wasn’t able to get as much done.

Q) It’s a good kind of tired.

A) Right.

Q) You’re almost six years into priesthood. What has surprised you?

A) It’s been surprising how fulfilling it is to hear confessions, to see people return to the Lord and to be able to help them in that. People might think it’s depressing to hear people’s sins, but it’s hopeful and it’s good because they’re returning to the Lord.

Q) Does that help offset some of the heavier parts of your work at the tribunal?

A) I would say so. It’s the human heart wanting to return to God from the different places where it’s gotten lost.

Q) That’s a lovely thing.

A) There’s no place we can run, no mess we can get into so big that God will abandon us. Sometimes we think we’ve managed to escape from God’s providence. But God still loves us, his grace is available to us and there is still a path forward.